Biting in Toddlers: How We Support Your Child and How You Can Help at Home
Biting. It’s not something you want to hear your child is doing, nor do you want to have your child bit. It hurts, it’s gross, and once one kid starts, it catches on like fire.
Biting can be a very challenging and concerning behavior for parents. But rest assured—it is a common developmental stage that many toddlers go through. While it can be frustrating or even upsetting, toddler biting is typically a result of underlying emotions or unmet needs rather than intentional misbehavior.
In this blog, we’ll explain why toddlers bite, how we handle biting incidents at our center, and how you can support your child at home to reduce biting behavior.
Why Do Toddlers Bite?
Biting is common in early childhood, particularly among toddlers. Several reasons could explain why your child bites:
Communication
Toddlers are still developing language skills and may bite as a way to express their feelings. If they are frustrated, angry, excited, or overwhelmed, biting can be a way to communicate when they don’t yet have the words to do so.
Teething
For some, toddler biting can be related to discomfort from teething. Biting down on objects (or even people) can relieve the pressure they feel as their teeth come in.
Exploration
Young children are naturally curious and explore the world through their senses. Sometimes, a toddler bites as a way of learning about their environment—similar to how they touch or taste new objects.
Attention
If a child is seeking attention—whether positive or negative—biting may be a way to get it quickly.
Frustration or Overstimulation
Toddlers can become overwhelmed or overstimulated in certain situations, leading them to bite out of frustration. In some cases, young children bite when they are trying to assert control or manage their emotions. Childcare centers have multiple children of the same age in one room, all learning to be polite and kind friends.
At this development stage, sharing space, let alone toys, can be challenging and lead to a lot of moments of frustration and overstimulation. In the long run, this challenge creates a wonderful self-management skill set. But at the moment, it doesn’t present itself as a gift at all.
How We Address Biting at My Childcare Academy
At My Childcare Academy, we take a compassionate, child-centered approach to dealing with biting.
We see biting as an unavoidable phase within our toddler rooms. That’s why we equip our teachers and classrooms with the proper tools and education to expedite the phase as quickly as possible. Our goal is to help your child understand and express their emotions in more positive ways.
Here’s how we address toddler biting in our classrooms:
1. Observation and Understanding
By closely observing a child’s behavior, we can begin to understand what might be triggering the biting incident. Is it occurring during playtime, when they’re feeling overwhelmed, or when they’re tired? By identifying the underlying cause, we can be more prepared and intervene in a meaningful way.
2. Redirection
When we see signs that a child may be about to bite (such as frustration or overexcitement), we step in to redirect the child’s attention to an appropriate response. Offering a teething toy, engaging them in a new activity, or providing a calming space can often prevent the biting from happening in the first place.
3. Teaching Alternative Behaviors
We work with toddlers to help them develop better ways to communicate and express themselves. If biting is linked to frustration or lack of language, we encourage the use of words or simple sign language to express needs, such as “help,” “stop,” or “more.”
4. Consistency
Our teachers respond consistently to biting incidents.
If biting occurs, we calmly and firmly explain that biting is not okay. We avoid punitive reactions and instead focus on teaching empathy, such as helping the child understand how their actions affect others:
“Biting hurts. We use our words or gentle hands instead.” Since biting can also be a way to gain attention, another tactic can be to simply say, “Ouch!” and offer lots of hugs and attention to the child who was bit.
5. Positive Reinforcement
We praise and encourage positive behaviors, reinforcing when children express themselves in appropriate ways without biting. Positive reinforcement helps children feel supported and learn better communication strategies.
6. Partnership with Parents
Since biting is very effective in getting an immediate response, biting has a tendency to become a toddler’s main form of communication – once they find it. And once one child bites, the entire classroom usually begins biting.
When biting becomes a pattern, we communicate closely with parents to ensure that we are working together on a consistent approach both at home and at the center. Usually, a kids bite gets back under control within a week or two.
How You Can Help at Home
If your child is biting, there are several things you can do at home to help them navigate this phase and get them to stop biting:
1. Stay Calm and Consistent
It’s important to remain calm when addressing biting. Respond firmly but gently by saying something like, “No biting. Biting hurts.” Avoid reacting with anger, as this can make the behavior worse or more confusing for your child. Consistent responses help your child understand that biting is not acceptable.
2. Offer Alternatives
Help your child find alternative ways to express their emotions. Encourage them to use words, gestures, or other non-hurtful actions when they’re upset. If teething is the issue, provide safe teething toys or a cold washcloth to chew on for relief.
3. Teach Empathy
Even at a young age, children can begin to understand empathy. After an incident, calmly explain how biting affects others: “When you bite, it hurts your friend. Let’s use gentle touches instead.” Role-playing with dolls or stuffed animals can also help reinforce this lesson. There are also a lot of books about how to prevent biting that can be helpful to reinforce empathy.
4. Provide Attention
If biting is an attention-seeking behavior, make sure to give your child plenty of positive attention when they are behaving well. Encourage their efforts and celebrate when they use their words or gentle actions instead of biting.
Try to limit the attention or big reaction given when a bite does take place.
5. Create a Calm Environment
Sometimes, biting behavior happens when a child feels overwhelmed or overstimulated. Offering a calm, structured environment at home can help reduce stress and provide your child with a sense of security. Incorporating quiet time or relaxation activities can help them manage big emotions.
6. Find a Way to Say Yes to Biting
This might seem like a weird concept, but if you can find instances in which biting is acceptable, you can teach your child that they can bite as long as it isn’t harmful.
For instance, we don’t bite friends, but we can bite a teething toy. We don’t bite Mom, but we can bite a carrot. Since biting can be a sensory exploration for children, finding a way to say yes, can help the child find ways to explore biting in a way that doesn’t harm others but still fulfills their need to bite down on things.
7. Consistency Between Home and the Center
Consistency is key when addressing toddler bites. Talk with us about strategies we’re using at My Childcare Academy so that you can reinforce the same approaches at home. Working together ensures that your child gets a clear and consistent message about what is expected.
Remember: Biting is a Phase
While biting can be frustrating, it’s important to remember that it’s a common developmental phase for toddlers. With patience, consistency, and support, most children outgrow this behavior as they develop better communication and emotional regulation skills.
At My Childcare Academy, we’re here to support you and your child every step of the way. If you have any concerns or questions about your child’s behavior, don’t hesitate to reach out to us. By working together, we can help your child navigate this phase and learn positive ways to interact with others.